Often people that come to see me for a sex addiction are using sex as a displacement behaviour. That is to say, they are using sex as a distraction or 'solution' to other emotional problems. An example of this would be when something occurs that causes them stress. Their way of dealing with this stress would be to think of engaging with some sexual activity later in the day. This train of thought has given them an 'exit point' from the stressful feelings and temporarily changes their state and so makes them feel a bit better and life a bit more bearable. There is often (but not always) a history to this behaviour that has it's roots in childhood distress of some kind e.g. breakup of the family, trust issues or low self worth. Whilst the sex or porn was originally a coping strategy for dealing with those uncomfortable times, it has since become a problem, making a person feel bad about themselves and stopping them from moving on in their lives.
The problem is that most approaches to sex addiction treat it as the primary problem rather than the coping strategy it actually is.
This is like trying to take away the only strategy a person is aware of, for dealing with their stress issues. No wonder a person feels conflicted when they try and stop.
So for meaningful change to take place, a person requires help dealing with the emotional issues that the 'sex addiction' is a displacement for, then it ceases to serve a purpose and is far easier to deal with.
For more information (in confidence) call: 07776304063